“Are single mothers destined to struggle?” asked Wang Tiemei, the protagonist in the recent hit female-led comedy “Her Story.”

The film challenges conventional narratives by portraying a resolute and independent single mother, Wang, and her brave and courageous daughter Momo.

Contrary to common perceptions, data shows that single-mother families are more common than expected. According to the 2022 China Family Panel Studies (CFPS), around 0.9% of minors — roughly one in every 100 children — live with single mothers, including those who are widowed, divorced, or unmarried.

Urban, educated women are more likely to raise children alone

What is the profile of single mothers in China?

Zhang Chunni, an associate professor of Sociology at Peking University, offers insights in her 2019 book “Children From Divorced Families in China.” Her research shows that single mothers who choose to raise children after divorce are more common in urban areas among well-educated women. These women earn an average annual income of 17,000 yuan ($2,338), higher than that of dual-parent or single-father families.

Single mothers spare no expense for their children

A Renwu magazine report highlighted a single mother in Changsha, the capital of central Hunan province, who raised two children alone. After a car accident left her temporarily unable to walk, she waived financial compensation, instead asking the at-fault party to “just help take care of my kids for now.”

Cooking, doing chores, taking children from home to school and back, and putting them to bed are often considered “mom’s duties.” For single mothers, these caregiving responsibilities remain unchanged. A study using CFPS data shows that in divorced single-parent households, 64.2% of the children are cared for by their mothers, compared to only 55.2% in dual-parent families. Additionally, children in single-father households are more likely to be raised by grandparents.

Meanwhile, single mothers’ financial investments in their children showed no significant difference from dual-parent families. However, children from single-father families tended to receive more pocket money. Researchers suggest this may be because fathers prioritize material provisions while neglecting emotional support and daily companionship.

The daily expenses of single mothers also lean heavily toward their children. A questionnaire found that 61.1% of single mothers believe they spend more on their children’s education, while only 4.9% perceive themselves as spending more on clothes and accessories.

Notably, balancing work and childcare often requires single mothers to trade off their income and working hours. Jiemian News shared the story of Ding Shutong, a single mother in Beijing who once worked at an auction company from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. for a base salary of 15,000 yuan per month. Her new job, paying only one-third of her previous salary, offered a more flexible schedule that allowed her more time to care for her son.

An “intact” family isn’t always better

A survey by the China Association of Marriage and Family Studies (CAMF) reveals that single mothers most commonly regret not providing an “intact” family for their children.

But does staying in an unhappy marriage really benefit children? Are single-mother households inherently disadvantaged compared to dual-parent families?

Zhang’s research compared children’s academic, social, and behavioral performance across 48 metrics. The study found no statistically significant differences between children from single-mother households and those from dual-parent families. In fact, children from conflict-ridden dual-parent families often performed worse in areas such as academic stress, happiness, self-confidence, and peer relationships.

For children, persistent family conflicts are far more damaging than parental divorce. Zhang explains that constant arguments can lead parents to neglect their children, reduce emotional investment, and create feelings of insecurity in their offspring, ultimately resulting in poorer outcomes. In other words, research shows that children can grow up healthy and happy when surrounded by love and joy — even in single-parent households.

Under scrutiny? Social pressures on single mothers

In the film “Her Story,” when Wang shares her story as a single mother online, it sparks widespread criticism. Similarly, in real life, single mothers also often encounter unfriendly treatment based on their family status. In the Jiemian News report, Ding recounted how coworkers questioned her need to leave work early to pick up her child, citing her single-mother status. Teachers at her son’s kindergarten also attributed his behavior — whether too mischievous or well-behaved — to his family background.

According to the CAMF research, more than half of single mothers are hesitant to disclose their single-parent status, mainly out of fear of judgment (64.6%). Their concerns become even more pronounced when it comes to revealing their children’s family background. The main worries include potential perceptions of their children as flawed (50.5%) or the risk of peer bullying (37.7%).

Despite these challenges, single mothers remain resilient and optimistic. While nearly half report a decline in their living standards after becoming single parents, many emphasize improved personal resilience and higher self-expectations.

In the movie, when Wang begins doubting herself after reading harsh online comments, she tearfully scrolls through her phone, questioning her capabilities as a mother. Ye, her female neighbor, challenges her with a powerful question: “But who’s the judge here?” In reality, single mothers continue to live with hope, striving for happiness alongside their children.

Reported by Du Haiyan.

A version of this article originally appeared in The Paper. It has been translated and edited for brevity and clarity, and is republished here with permission.

Translator: Wang Jingyang; graphic designers: Wang Yasai and Luo Yahan; editors: Wang Juyi and Elise Mak.